On Your Marks, Get Set, LAN!!!

Friday was Sports Day, and I stayed up till four in the morning doing random things in anticipation, planning to sleep my way through it. Which I did rather unsuccessfully, given all the noise that was around me. Only parts of the day I clearly remember was Bernard Teo practically walking in the Old Boy's 100 meter race while waving to the crowd, Bryant winning something somewhere, and thinking that if Brandon Yang was an American like they said so over the PA system, then I was a Vietnamese. Or perhaps an Australian.

Anyway, after hazing my way through that affair, I had 3 choices, either follow Bryant with Jin and Daryl for lunch, follow Khai Sam and company for lunch, or go home like a good little boy like Sam had.

Decided on following Khai Sam and Co., since Daryl wanted to go to Orchard for something, and I simply didn't feel like traveling too much after going on barely two hours of sleep. We rounded up the two Chrises and Sam Chou to follow us, Khai Sam apparently bent on bringing us to some food court he thought was good. It involved much walking from the stadium in Toa Payoh, and swore to knock him silly if it turned out to be some Acorn Heaven for squirrels like him.

Turned out to be the food court UPSTAIRS at HDB Hub. At which point I realized I didn't have enough material cash in hand, so I went to Mac's on my own, and chanced upon Dillon there, Sam's protege in the arts of many rather unspeakable practices. When I went back up to Sam Chou, he had got it into his head that now was a very good time to go LANning, but we had a odd number of people. Remembering Dillon, I rushed back down to invite him with us.

Upon which, his other friends also decided to come, and Chou at the same time had managed to attract the attention of another 2 of his NPCC mates to come along while we were at Mac's. I had created a great LAN Waaagh! of close to 15 people. Unknowingly. Do I get Gamer Score for this? Like doing all of Binomial 1 on ONE piece of foolscap?

Unfortunately, our merry Waaagh! was to be disappointed, the nearby LAN center being closed. Sam Chou saved the day with his ever reliable mental map of every LAN center within a 15km radius of the school, led us to Paradiz near Dhoby Ghout, where I convinced them to play CoD4, but with Khai Sam and Chris Ng left early.

In an effort to find more people to play with us, Dillon resorted to asking the CHIJ girls who walked by whether they wanted to play LAN with us. Whether or not he was joking, I don't know. He is Sam's protege after all. Journey there was quite eventful thats to him.

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Me : Dillon, you're never going to find a chick who's hot AND likes LANning. Girls like Lilah aren't real remember?

Dillon : Aww...

Me : Unless you create your own hot chicks who like LAN...

Dillon : HOW!!

Me : Well, we need to find a hot guy, a hot chick, get them to procreate, have a hot daughter, get them to teach her how to love LAN, and viola! A LAN loving hot chick.

Dillon : Well, I am hot, so that girl would have to be female version of me...

Me : You would be hailed as a patriarch who started a lineage of hot, LAN loving chicks. Generations of gaming males will salute you for your contribution to mankind!
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He also wishes to pioneer the Human-Animal Genome project on his own. Best not to go into details about that.

Chris Chui is a guy who trawls LAN centers at least once or twice a week, but didn't have any idea how to play CoD4. Refer to my earlier post on how Singapore's LAN scene is so undiversified. Sam Chou opted to teach him since he played the single player game, but given how they both played later on, it was like one monkey teaching another how to build a rocket. Out of leftover turkey, chewing gum and plywood planks.

I continued my partnership with the Heavy Gunner class, since I need a big gun with a large ammo capacity to make up for my terrible aim. Shen Shin complains I only got more kills than Dillon the last time because of the sheer volume of rounds flying out of my RPD. To which I reply, getcha own big shoota! I may use up 39 out of the 40 round mag to fire bullet angels around my target, but round 40 always is a headshot!

The habitual CS players never knew what hit them. Judging from their kill cams when they finally did manage to kill me, they hadn't even zoomed in with their sights half the time. I got two triple kills that day, the first one being rather unexpected, and very well timed.

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(My junior Tim Zhang walks in)

Zhang : Hey Micro, are you good at this game?

Me : Wah..??

(Sam Chou, Chris and one of Dillon's friends get mown down by RPD fire)

Me : Well, I did just get a triple kill without looking, you think?
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Learned the art of building camping as well. Sam Chou managed to knife me in the back once when I did that, but the second time, well, he kinda forgot I put a UAV in the air. *Scratches 4th marking on the wall*

Of course, there's always a bigger fish on the food chain, and Dillon was the apex predator in this one. I was having some much fun long ranging with the RPD that I didn't notice him sneak under the balcony I was camping on, and took me out with a quick burst from an assault rifle, my final moments shown to me on the kill cam. This happened more times than I can count, and I assure you, I can count pretty far.

Oh, I must go on raining praises on the RPD. How many ears have I collected through whoring you like an asshole? And with the laser sight upgrade, I actually gain some semblance of accuracy. Combined with the Juggernaunt and Deeper Penetration (Bow Chicka Wow Wow!) perk, added with the laser sight and my slightly gung ho tactic in charging ahead guns ablazing, all I have to do now to complete the set is find a chain axe and holler "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD, SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!!" when I charge.

My second triple kill came on our last map, Ambush. Chris, Sam Chou and one of Dillon's friends came at me. Ordinarily, I would have killed one or two guys and died, but with the laser sight, no more OpFor resistance fighters.

I was playing Metroid Hunters on the bus when Bryant happened to board. What are the odds?

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Bryant : So you did you do?

Me : I opened the eyes of two CS bottom feeders. They now see the light.

Bryant : LANning I see...

Me : You?

Bryant : Had two lunches, walked about Hiren with Daryl looking for a bag, couldn't find it, he bought a speaker for his iPod instead.

Me : So you guys looked for something you never found, bought something you guys never intended to buy, and had two lunches.

Bryant : Yeah.

Me : You should have come with us.

Bryant : No shit....
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I love Sports Day!

What about everyone else?

Hours Mugging : 15