Friday was Sports Day, and I stayed up till four in the morning doing random things in anticipation, planning to sleep my way through it. Which I did rather unsuccessfully, given all the noise that was around me. Only parts of the day I clearly remember was Bernard Teo practically walking in the Old Boy's 100 meter race while waving to the crowd, Bryant winning something somewhere, and thinking that if Brandon Yang was an American like they said so over the PA system, then I was a Vietnamese. Or perhaps an Australian.
Anyway, after hazing my way through that affair, I had 3 choices, either follow Bryant with Jin and Daryl for lunch, follow Khai Sam and company for lunch, or go home like a good little boy like Sam had.
Decided on following Khai Sam and Co., since Daryl wanted to go to Orchard for something, and I simply didn't feel like traveling too much after going on barely two hours of sleep. We rounded up the two Chrises and Sam Chou to follow us, Khai Sam apparently bent on bringing us to some food court he thought was good. It involved much walking from the stadium in Toa Payoh, and swore to knock him silly if it turned out to be some Acorn Heaven for squirrels like him.
Turned out to be the food court UPSTAIRS at HDB Hub. At which point I realized I didn't have enough material cash in hand, so I went to Mac's on my own, and chanced upon Dillon there, Sam's protege in the arts of many rather unspeakable practices. When I went back up to Sam Chou, he had got it into his head that now was a very good time to go LANning, but we had a odd number of people. Remembering Dillon, I rushed back down to invite him with us.
Upon which, his other friends also decided to come, and Chou at the same time had managed to attract the attention of another 2 of his NPCC mates to come along while we were at Mac's. I had created a great LAN Waaagh! of close to 15 people. Unknowingly. Do I get Gamer Score for this? Like doing all of Binomial 1 on ONE piece of foolscap?
Unfortunately, our merry Waaagh! was to be disappointed, the nearby LAN center being closed. Sam Chou saved the day with his ever reliable mental map of every LAN center within a 15km radius of the school, led us to Paradiz near Dhoby Ghout, where I convinced them to play CoD4, but with Khai Sam and Chris Ng left early.
In an effort to find more people to play with us, Dillon resorted to asking the CHIJ girls who walked by whether they wanted to play LAN with us. Whether or not he was joking, I don't know. He is Sam's protege after all. Journey there was quite eventful thats to him.
------------
Me : Dillon, you're never going to find a chick who's hot AND likes LANning. Girls like Lilah aren't real remember?
Dillon : Aww...
Me : Unless you create your own hot chicks who like LAN...
Dillon : HOW!!
Me : Well, we need to find a hot guy, a hot chick, get them to procreate, have a hot daughter, get them to teach her how to love LAN, and viola! A LAN loving hot chick.
Dillon : Well, I am hot, so that girl would have to be female version of me...
Me : You would be hailed as a patriarch who started a lineage of hot, LAN loving chicks. Generations of gaming males will salute you for your contribution to mankind!
--------
He also wishes to pioneer the Human-Animal Genome project on his own. Best not to go into details about that.
Chris Chui is a guy who trawls LAN centers at least once or twice a week, but didn't have any idea how to play CoD4. Refer to my earlier post on how Singapore's LAN scene is so undiversified. Sam Chou opted to teach him since he played the single player game, but given how they both played later on, it was like one monkey teaching another how to build a rocket. Out of leftover turkey, chewing gum and plywood planks.
I continued my partnership with the Heavy Gunner class, since I need a big gun with a large ammo capacity to make up for my terrible aim. Shen Shin complains I only got more kills than Dillon the last time because of the sheer volume of rounds flying out of my RPD. To which I reply, getcha own big shoota! I may use up 39 out of the 40 round mag to fire bullet angels around my target, but round 40 always is a headshot!
The habitual CS players never knew what hit them. Judging from their kill cams when they finally did manage to kill me, they hadn't even zoomed in with their sights half the time. I got two triple kills that day, the first one being rather unexpected, and very well timed.
--------
(My junior Tim Zhang walks in)
Zhang : Hey Micro, are you good at this game?
Me : Wah..??
(Sam Chou, Chris and one of Dillon's friends get mown down by RPD fire)
Me : Well, I did just get a triple kill without looking, you think?
-------
Learned the art of building camping as well. Sam Chou managed to knife me in the back once when I did that, but the second time, well, he kinda forgot I put a UAV in the air. *Scratches 4th marking on the wall*
Of course, there's always a bigger fish on the food chain, and Dillon was the apex predator in this one. I was having some much fun long ranging with the RPD that I didn't notice him sneak under the balcony I was camping on, and took me out with a quick burst from an assault rifle, my final moments shown to me on the kill cam. This happened more times than I can count, and I assure you, I can count pretty far.
Oh, I must go on raining praises on the RPD. How many ears have I collected through whoring you like an asshole? And with the laser sight upgrade, I actually gain some semblance of accuracy. Combined with the Juggernaunt and Deeper Penetration (Bow Chicka Wow Wow!) perk, added with the laser sight and my slightly gung ho tactic in charging ahead guns ablazing, all I have to do now to complete the set is find a chain axe and holler "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD, SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!!" when I charge.
My second triple kill came on our last map, Ambush. Chris, Sam Chou and one of Dillon's friends came at me. Ordinarily, I would have killed one or two guys and died, but with the laser sight, no more OpFor resistance fighters.
I was playing Metroid Hunters on the bus when Bryant happened to board. What are the odds?
-------
Bryant : So you did you do?
Me : I opened the eyes of two CS bottom feeders. They now see the light.
Bryant : LANning I see...
Me : You?
Bryant : Had two lunches, walked about Hiren with Daryl looking for a bag, couldn't find it, he bought a speaker for his iPod instead.
Me : So you guys looked for something you never found, bought something you guys never intended to buy, and had two lunches.
Bryant : Yeah.
Me : You should have come with us.
Bryant : No shit....
----------
I love Sports Day!
What about everyone else?
Hours Mugging : 15
Monday, 28 April 2008
Thursday, 24 April 2008
Literature Festival = Zzzzzz
I didn't exactly enjoy it. They made me wake up early on a Saturday, the fiends... Anyway, my parents sent Bryant and I over to St Nicks after breakfast. Luckily everyone had from our school had decided to stand right at the entrance, so we didn't have to look around for them.
And thats about all I remember!! Why?? Because I wasn't lucid for most of it.
-----------
Bryant : Why does everyone shut up when I turn the camera on???
Jem : Okay, HI! Boner!
Me : You mah hoe!
Bryant : Astounding maturity.
-----------
Well, Bryant's video kinda jolted the memories. And thats what me and Jem pretty much did, after Sam left for a "dental" appointment.
Wait, its all coming back to me now....
We were eventually ushered into a lecture theater much like the one at CHIJ KC (Wonder if they all hired the same architect?) where we waited for close to half an hour for the speaker to actually arrive. We got an introduction to lit by a teacher who obviously did not take lit, before the speaker finally arrived. Can't remember her name, but she had the same surname as Ruizhi.
Anyway, me, Ken, Jem, Arun, Bryant and Sam(At first) were reduced to playing Ghost to stave off the encroaching boredom. Sam left around this time for his "dental" appointment, and after Ghost round 9834, me and Ken even discussed RuneScape openly. Normally, players have to keep this a secret since we are persecuted by SOME people for playing it (UBCS suck!!), and practice it like the Freemason religion.
During the break, we did walk around the place, remarking why the hell they had 3 pianos and a PMS room. Luke tried to prank call from their payphone.
Then came the presentations from all the other schools. Apparently, I failed to make known earlier that there were quite a few.
Well, they weren't all bad. Wait, the Gan Eng Seng one was a bit on the ePiC FaIl side. They came in their blazers and all, but their presentation was only as good as the one my group cobbled together in an hour to prevent BAng from toasting our butts over a fire. And one of them pronounced Atticus as "Ah-tticus". They counted Tom Robinson as a minor character for some reason, and said his trial was the climax in To Kill A Mockingbird.
----------
In Lit class
Me : Mrs Ang, doesn't this book climax multiple times??
Mrs Ang : Yah, like a woman right?
----------
And I thought only Ms Lee did that kind of thing...
Amos's group did a pretty okay job, I actually paid conscious attention to them, which is more than I can really say for some of the other groups.
Chris Gonzali and Liwei's presentation really took the cake though. They opened up with music video. Their theme was on domination in Midsummers Night Dream. The whole thing screamed !EMO!, and maybe they shouldn't have delved so deeply into the masochism bit, but they were easily the best group there. Attention grabbing, if a bit too provocative, and definitely having a good stance, it was made of win.
Went for lunch after that at AMK hub, using my Subway sense to guide our merry band of Kevin, Bryant, Joshua, Jem and I to the Subway there. Of course....
----------
Kevin : Its full...
Me : Apparently...
Kevin : Maybe we can trade. I know, we'll trade anyone who gives up their table Cheng Heng!
Jem : Yeah, ultimate vacuum cleaner! Of course, you'll have to program him to make sure he doesn't regard your dog or your kids as trash/food.
----------
In the end, we did find a table through the crowd, and I moved toward it as politely as I could, before throwing my bag on the empty seat and annexing the table into the Empire of Slumnia.
After lunch and watching Joshua being prodded and tickled mercilessly by Kevin, I scouted out the games shop in AMK Hub with Jem and Bryant. Discovered Metroid Prime : Hunters going at only $35 down there. Its second hand, but I vowed to rescue it from its ungainly position on the bargain shelf. Got it on Monday. Sisters of Battle were cloned from Samus. She is that 1337.
And thats about all I remember!! Why?? Because I wasn't lucid for most of it.
-----------
Bryant : Why does everyone shut up when I turn the camera on???
Jem : Okay, HI! Boner!
Me : You mah hoe!
Bryant : Astounding maturity.
-----------
Well, Bryant's video kinda jolted the memories. And thats what me and Jem pretty much did, after Sam left for a "dental" appointment.
Wait, its all coming back to me now....
We were eventually ushered into a lecture theater much like the one at CHIJ KC (Wonder if they all hired the same architect?) where we waited for close to half an hour for the speaker to actually arrive. We got an introduction to lit by a teacher who obviously did not take lit, before the speaker finally arrived. Can't remember her name, but she had the same surname as Ruizhi.
Anyway, me, Ken, Jem, Arun, Bryant and Sam(At first) were reduced to playing Ghost to stave off the encroaching boredom. Sam left around this time for his "dental" appointment, and after Ghost round 9834, me and Ken even discussed RuneScape openly. Normally, players have to keep this a secret since we are persecuted by SOME people for playing it (UBCS suck!!), and practice it like the Freemason religion.
During the break, we did walk around the place, remarking why the hell they had 3 pianos and a PMS room. Luke tried to prank call from their payphone.
Then came the presentations from all the other schools. Apparently, I failed to make known earlier that there were quite a few.
Well, they weren't all bad. Wait, the Gan Eng Seng one was a bit on the ePiC FaIl side. They came in their blazers and all, but their presentation was only as good as the one my group cobbled together in an hour to prevent BAng from toasting our butts over a fire. And one of them pronounced Atticus as "Ah-tticus". They counted Tom Robinson as a minor character for some reason, and said his trial was the climax in To Kill A Mockingbird.
----------
In Lit class
Me : Mrs Ang, doesn't this book climax multiple times??
Mrs Ang : Yah, like a woman right?
----------
And I thought only Ms Lee did that kind of thing...
Amos's group did a pretty okay job, I actually paid conscious attention to them, which is more than I can really say for some of the other groups.
Chris Gonzali and Liwei's presentation really took the cake though. They opened up with music video. Their theme was on domination in Midsummers Night Dream. The whole thing screamed !EMO!, and maybe they shouldn't have delved so deeply into the masochism bit, but they were easily the best group there. Attention grabbing, if a bit too provocative, and definitely having a good stance, it was made of win.
Went for lunch after that at AMK hub, using my Subway sense to guide our merry band of Kevin, Bryant, Joshua, Jem and I to the Subway there. Of course....
----------
Kevin : Its full...
Me : Apparently...
Kevin : Maybe we can trade. I know, we'll trade anyone who gives up their table Cheng Heng!
Jem : Yeah, ultimate vacuum cleaner! Of course, you'll have to program him to make sure he doesn't regard your dog or your kids as trash/food.
----------
In the end, we did find a table through the crowd, and I moved toward it as politely as I could, before throwing my bag on the empty seat and annexing the table into the Empire of Slumnia.
After lunch and watching Joshua being prodded and tickled mercilessly by Kevin, I scouted out the games shop in AMK Hub with Jem and Bryant. Discovered Metroid Prime : Hunters going at only $35 down there. Its second hand, but I vowed to rescue it from its ungainly position on the bargain shelf. Got it on Monday. Sisters of Battle were cloned from Samus. She is that 1337.
Monday, 14 April 2008
Out Of Order, How Fitting Indeed...
I'm forced to dub our recent school play, Out Of Order, EpIc fAiL!! Though I think I'd do well to explain the events leading up to it as well.
First off Mr Johnson told the biggest whopper of the month, claiming that tickets were flying off the shelves. They weren't. I managed to buy one for Friday, on the day itself.
Okay, maybe I was just tired and grumpy after my final competitive match for the school against St Andrews (Lost 0-12) having being hit twice in the head, one after the prop on the other side came in sideways in the scrum, the other when my own player kneed me in the face during another scrum. It was a nostalgic event, but thats a story for another post.
Anyway, rushing back for the act, I reached school just in time at 7, still under the impression that it started at 7. It started at 8. I need to read my tickets more often... Spent the hour waiting for Bryant and Shen Shin to arrive hanging out with Reuben and Max, and any other prefect on carpark duty. Managed to get Reuben to dance for me, one of the few things that went right that night. He pwns anyone on Step Up 2. Sam refused to go, said he could have gone LANning for 7 and a half hours with the 15 dollars from the tickets. How wise of him.
Once they'd arrived, we headed to the PAC and let Jin and Shen Shin argue out where to sit. As we filed into a row somewhere along the back, Jia Lei came along, though at least he had taken my advice on changing back to school uniform. The orange shirt he had borrowed to wear with the school pants just looked wrong. Coming from a fashion barbarian like me, yeah, it was that bad.
Of course, no one really relished the idea of sitting next to him, given his penchant for whining at just about everything. Shen Shin had been squeezed out to the outermost seat of our group, so he ended up next to him. While I'm not very fond of Jia Lei myself, the rate at which Shen Shin was openly suaning him was so bad, I was sure there was something in the Human Rights Charter against it. Even an idiot like Jia Lei has to be treated with some respect Comrade Communist.
-------
Shen Shin : Hey, if we threw Jia Lei's bag down, he'd be forced to run down and get it while we pang sei him.
(Stony silence)
-------
Keep in mind, Jia Lei is right next to him. Bryant had to bluntly tell him to give it a rest before he quit it. Even I felt sorry for Jia Lei. Though I did find another line in his long tirade against Mr Strawberry deserving of being a Literature or English question so commonly asked in our school.
-------
Shen Shin : If we dao (To ignore) Jia Lei completely, he might realize he isn't wanted here.
-------
Ferrousy!! Oh the ferrousy!!
Then along came Wayne (Who will now conveniently forget that I owe him 2 bucks), wearing a jacket over his PE uniform, then Jem, who I unsuccessfully tried to steal a Crunchie bar off. If I had known the dress code was this slack, I wouldn't have bothered going home after the match to change...
Anyway, the play started, opening up with the soundtrack from Soulja Boy I think, and numerous other soundtracks Sam Chou helpfully named, but I forgot. Somewhere along the thing, there was a guy named Sky... And a Filipino scholar with a drunk dad... And an invisible girlfriend along the way...
See, thats the problem. They kept jumping from one character's life to another, it was hard keeping track of it all. Worse still, for some reason, they made the audience laugh at really inappropriate moments. There was a bit somewhere where a dad was chewing his son out in Hokkien, but after the "Wo si ni lao pei!" (I am your father) bit, the entire audience was roaring with laughter. Admittedly, I joined them, the Hokkien version of Star Wars coming to mind. Lost lucidity somewhere around the 25 minute, regaining it only when Jem spoke to me.
---------
(Son flings dad to the floor)
Jem : Hey Cheng Heng, can you see who's the ho in that relationship??
Me : Not really, but you mah ho!
---------
Its an inside joke. Bryant says its immature, but he's a shining beacon of maturity and responsibility next to me, so I guess its moderate.
Yeah, anyway, back on topic. Storyline was super garbled. None of the events really flowed in a visible sequence. You have one guy getting wasted at the Ministry of Sound, popping drugs, but coming back perfectly A-OK to steal his best friend's girlfriend. Who is invisible for some reason. Probably because CHIJ doesn't want to collaborate with us anymore, so we got no female actresses. Its not because me and Zach John sabotaged the last time they did so during the Taming Game two years ago. The only major thing we did was screw over the curtain controls so they closed really slowly. I think.
Yeah, anyway, back to the invisible characters. At first I had no idea why the hell the guy was reciting poetry to empty air. It was only when he asked the void in front of him for her phone number did I realize what was supposed to be there. It's kinda freaky and wrong to watch a guy trying to put his arms around empty air and try and get fresh with it. Then there was another Indian character that was talking to an empty chair about how it had failed as a father in Tamil, which had the whole audience laughing again. We pretty much laughed at all the non-English language bits.
Then, all of a sudden, when one of the guys is about to commit suicide, the thing ends. My first thought was "Thats it?!!?!". My second was " F%^&ing scammers!!" I think Mr J was trying to do damage control when he came up to the stage to ask how the audience thought the play was, and passed out survey forms, but it was ePIc FaIl as well, given how it even elicited a "I WANT MY MONEY BACK!!" from a few guys in the crowd when he asked how good we thought the play was.
While filling survey forms with uniform line in the "Strongly disagree" column, Shen Shin asked out of the blue to change seat with me so he could be next to Bryant.
----------
Shen Shin : Cheng Heng, swap place with me
Me : What for....
Shen Shin : Because I want to be next to Bryant
Me : Whats in in for me...
Shen Shin : Jem makes for more interesting conversation for you.
----------
Whether I did it subconsciously to piss him off, or whether I really was too tired to think, but instead of letting move swap seats with me, I moved into the empty seat next to Bryant.
Dammit, I think Shen Shin has a thing for him. Remember here and now, if Shen Shin turns out to be one of the "Out Loud and Proud" guys, I was the first to figure out. Seriously Shen Shin, if you're reading this, you got to do things in a less obsessive way, cause you are sending all the REALLY wrong signals here. Unless they are right signals he wishes to convey, then in that case they are still REALLY wrong, because even if the wrong signals he is sending are right, that still makes it wrong because...because...
Ah son of a Lahore, I confused myself. Again. The point is, Out Of Order was suitably named, and all the poor guys who brought their girlfriends along, my heart goes out to you, you poor men... Kevin got off easy though, from what he told me. And no, I shall not comment whether his girlfriend is "tappable" Sam Loh.
I can't think of a better ending...
Light bulb growing trees!!!
First off Mr Johnson told the biggest whopper of the month, claiming that tickets were flying off the shelves. They weren't. I managed to buy one for Friday, on the day itself.
Okay, maybe I was just tired and grumpy after my final competitive match for the school against St Andrews (Lost 0-12) having being hit twice in the head, one after the prop on the other side came in sideways in the scrum, the other when my own player kneed me in the face during another scrum. It was a nostalgic event, but thats a story for another post.
Anyway, rushing back for the act, I reached school just in time at 7, still under the impression that it started at 7. It started at 8. I need to read my tickets more often... Spent the hour waiting for Bryant and Shen Shin to arrive hanging out with Reuben and Max, and any other prefect on carpark duty. Managed to get Reuben to dance for me, one of the few things that went right that night. He pwns anyone on Step Up 2. Sam refused to go, said he could have gone LANning for 7 and a half hours with the 15 dollars from the tickets. How wise of him.
Once they'd arrived, we headed to the PAC and let Jin and Shen Shin argue out where to sit. As we filed into a row somewhere along the back, Jia Lei came along, though at least he had taken my advice on changing back to school uniform. The orange shirt he had borrowed to wear with the school pants just looked wrong. Coming from a fashion barbarian like me, yeah, it was that bad.
Of course, no one really relished the idea of sitting next to him, given his penchant for whining at just about everything. Shen Shin had been squeezed out to the outermost seat of our group, so he ended up next to him. While I'm not very fond of Jia Lei myself, the rate at which Shen Shin was openly suaning him was so bad, I was sure there was something in the Human Rights Charter against it. Even an idiot like Jia Lei has to be treated with some respect Comrade Communist.
-------
Shen Shin : Hey, if we threw Jia Lei's bag down, he'd be forced to run down and get it while we pang sei him.
(Stony silence)
-------
Keep in mind, Jia Lei is right next to him. Bryant had to bluntly tell him to give it a rest before he quit it. Even I felt sorry for Jia Lei. Though I did find another line in his long tirade against Mr Strawberry deserving of being a Literature or English question so commonly asked in our school.
-------
Shen Shin : If we dao (To ignore) Jia Lei completely, he might realize he isn't wanted here.
-------
Ferrousy!! Oh the ferrousy!!
Then along came Wayne (Who will now conveniently forget that I owe him 2 bucks), wearing a jacket over his PE uniform, then Jem, who I unsuccessfully tried to steal a Crunchie bar off. If I had known the dress code was this slack, I wouldn't have bothered going home after the match to change...
Anyway, the play started, opening up with the soundtrack from Soulja Boy I think, and numerous other soundtracks Sam Chou helpfully named, but I forgot. Somewhere along the thing, there was a guy named Sky... And a Filipino scholar with a drunk dad... And an invisible girlfriend along the way...
See, thats the problem. They kept jumping from one character's life to another, it was hard keeping track of it all. Worse still, for some reason, they made the audience laugh at really inappropriate moments. There was a bit somewhere where a dad was chewing his son out in Hokkien, but after the "Wo si ni lao pei!" (I am your father) bit, the entire audience was roaring with laughter. Admittedly, I joined them, the Hokkien version of Star Wars coming to mind. Lost lucidity somewhere around the 25 minute, regaining it only when Jem spoke to me.
---------
(Son flings dad to the floor)
Jem : Hey Cheng Heng, can you see who's the ho in that relationship??
Me : Not really, but you mah ho!
---------
Its an inside joke. Bryant says its immature, but he's a shining beacon of maturity and responsibility next to me, so I guess its moderate.
Yeah, anyway, back on topic. Storyline was super garbled. None of the events really flowed in a visible sequence. You have one guy getting wasted at the Ministry of Sound, popping drugs, but coming back perfectly A-OK to steal his best friend's girlfriend. Who is invisible for some reason. Probably because CHIJ doesn't want to collaborate with us anymore, so we got no female actresses. Its not because me and Zach John sabotaged the last time they did so during the Taming Game two years ago. The only major thing we did was screw over the curtain controls so they closed really slowly. I think.
Yeah, anyway, back to the invisible characters. At first I had no idea why the hell the guy was reciting poetry to empty air. It was only when he asked the void in front of him for her phone number did I realize what was supposed to be there. It's kinda freaky and wrong to watch a guy trying to put his arms around empty air and try and get fresh with it. Then there was another Indian character that was talking to an empty chair about how it had failed as a father in Tamil, which had the whole audience laughing again. We pretty much laughed at all the non-English language bits.
Then, all of a sudden, when one of the guys is about to commit suicide, the thing ends. My first thought was "Thats it?!!?!". My second was " F%^&ing scammers!!" I think Mr J was trying to do damage control when he came up to the stage to ask how the audience thought the play was, and passed out survey forms, but it was ePIc FaIl as well, given how it even elicited a "I WANT MY MONEY BACK!!" from a few guys in the crowd when he asked how good we thought the play was.
While filling survey forms with uniform line in the "Strongly disagree" column, Shen Shin asked out of the blue to change seat with me so he could be next to Bryant.
----------
Shen Shin : Cheng Heng, swap place with me
Me : What for....
Shen Shin : Because I want to be next to Bryant
Me : Whats in in for me...
Shen Shin : Jem makes for more interesting conversation for you.
----------
Whether I did it subconsciously to piss him off, or whether I really was too tired to think, but instead of letting move swap seats with me, I moved into the empty seat next to Bryant.
Dammit, I think Shen Shin has a thing for him. Remember here and now, if Shen Shin turns out to be one of the "Out Loud and Proud" guys, I was the first to figure out. Seriously Shen Shin, if you're reading this, you got to do things in a less obsessive way, cause you are sending all the REALLY wrong signals here. Unless they are right signals he wishes to convey, then in that case they are still REALLY wrong, because even if the wrong signals he is sending are right, that still makes it wrong because...because...
Ah son of a Lahore, I confused myself. Again. The point is, Out Of Order was suitably named, and all the poor guys who brought their girlfriends along, my heart goes out to you, you poor men... Kevin got off easy though, from what he told me. And no, I shall not comment whether his girlfriend is "tappable" Sam Loh.
I can't think of a better ending...
Light bulb growing trees!!!
Tuesday, 8 April 2008
Monday Blues...
Okay, Monday was bad. Despite the fact it was Founders Day, and a half day. Why?? Because it just so happened our semi-final with ACSI was on the same day, in the afternoon, effectively neutralizing the extra time of the half day, since we all had to report back by 3 for the match.
Founder's Day, well, wasn't different from any other Founder's Day. The usual handing out of prizes, timing of how long Mr. Lui's speech would take this year (12 minutes 31 seconds). I liked last year's Guest Of Honour better. Unlike this one, he was a real average Joe, like 99.9% of the school's population, not like the overachiever this one sounded like. Chess captain AND marathon runner and numerous other notable achievements. Yes, the waves of jealousy and hate are just radiating off me aren't they?? Oh come on, doesn't everyone feel a little tug of envy when they see someone like that??
Shen Shin accidentally let loose that Sam wouldn't be getting a trophy for the fencing competition, not knowing that it was something which the fencing team intended to keep quiet about until a later date, to save him some anguish. He wasn't exactly in a mood to speak after that, so trying to count all the guys on the first floor became my only pastime for the rest of the celebrations.
While I did manage to rush back home by 1, all I managed to save was an hour and a half from the very inconvenient match fixture, which was partially to blame me forgetting the time and nearly arriving late for the match briefing.
Which threw the biggest shock at me yet.
---------
Coach : Micro, today, you start as prop.
Me :????
Coach : Come on lah, don't look so blur today...
---------
Very bad time for my signature blank look to come out. Despite having played in every match this year except on, I'd been longing for a start all season after falling from the starting lineup this year, but now wasn't a prime time to get it back. ACSI were on a roll, not having lost a single match this season yet, and they didn't intend to break the habit.
We conceded the first try in the first minute, but we made a spirited comeback, pushing them all the way back far enough to look like we might actually score. Our forwards flung themselves at the ACSI defense line, trying to take advantage of our heavier players. A couple more runs by Luohan and me had us 10 meters from the try line. Then someone conceded a penalty. We pretty much lost it from then on.
They just ran through us time and again, and I lost count of how many tries they scored. We lost 83-0. I have never seen SJI lose that badly, to anyone in my four years here. Its a terrible feeling, even worse since I played the full match. We can blame it on 4 to 5 starting players, captain included, not being able to play, but it still sucked.
Annoying thing was, they didn't trash talk or play dirty like they had two years ago. That gave me the will to drag a couple of them for a high velocity sand bath in the drier parts of the field. That hurts like a bitch, just ask Tim Foo. They actually were decently behaved and polite, or at least tried to be. While rugby is supposed to be a rough game, I refuse to try anything dodgy unless the opposition does it first. A stupid moral to stick by?? I don't know, I just don't want to hurt another rule abiding guy like me too much.
Sigh, Monday blues....
Founder's Day, well, wasn't different from any other Founder's Day. The usual handing out of prizes, timing of how long Mr. Lui's speech would take this year (12 minutes 31 seconds). I liked last year's Guest Of Honour better. Unlike this one, he was a real average Joe, like 99.9% of the school's population, not like the overachiever this one sounded like. Chess captain AND marathon runner and numerous other notable achievements. Yes, the waves of jealousy and hate are just radiating off me aren't they?? Oh come on, doesn't everyone feel a little tug of envy when they see someone like that??
Shen Shin accidentally let loose that Sam wouldn't be getting a trophy for the fencing competition, not knowing that it was something which the fencing team intended to keep quiet about until a later date, to save him some anguish. He wasn't exactly in a mood to speak after that, so trying to count all the guys on the first floor became my only pastime for the rest of the celebrations.
While I did manage to rush back home by 1, all I managed to save was an hour and a half from the very inconvenient match fixture, which was partially to blame me forgetting the time and nearly arriving late for the match briefing.
Which threw the biggest shock at me yet.
---------
Coach : Micro, today, you start as prop.
Me :????
Coach : Come on lah, don't look so blur today...
---------
Very bad time for my signature blank look to come out. Despite having played in every match this year except on, I'd been longing for a start all season after falling from the starting lineup this year, but now wasn't a prime time to get it back. ACSI were on a roll, not having lost a single match this season yet, and they didn't intend to break the habit.
We conceded the first try in the first minute, but we made a spirited comeback, pushing them all the way back far enough to look like we might actually score. Our forwards flung themselves at the ACSI defense line, trying to take advantage of our heavier players. A couple more runs by Luohan and me had us 10 meters from the try line. Then someone conceded a penalty. We pretty much lost it from then on.
They just ran through us time and again, and I lost count of how many tries they scored. We lost 83-0. I have never seen SJI lose that badly, to anyone in my four years here. Its a terrible feeling, even worse since I played the full match. We can blame it on 4 to 5 starting players, captain included, not being able to play, but it still sucked.
Annoying thing was, they didn't trash talk or play dirty like they had two years ago. That gave me the will to drag a couple of them for a high velocity sand bath in the drier parts of the field. That hurts like a bitch, just ask Tim Foo. They actually were decently behaved and polite, or at least tried to be. While rugby is supposed to be a rough game, I refuse to try anything dodgy unless the opposition does it first. A stupid moral to stick by?? I don't know, I just don't want to hurt another rule abiding guy like me too much.
Sigh, Monday blues....
Sunday, 6 April 2008
Jack Black Is Win!!
Before I continue with this post, I will hereby dub any comedy with Jack Black in it honourarily win.
April has started off rather well. For the first time in my life, I was not pranked on April Fools!
Deon : Hey Micro, got training today.
Micro : Nut off, its April Fools
Deon : Damn...
Maybe if Loy or Gabriel had done it, it would more believable, but this is Deon we're talking about, the one who only shows up sporadically for training.
Got Bryant on April Fools too.
Me : Hey Bryant, Chinese focus group is canceled today
Bryant : YES!!!! (Does dance)
Me : You do remember what day it is today right??
Bryant : **** you...
Ms Kaur's was still the most 1337 prank though. 423 tried to prank her by switching class with 106, she screwed them over, "sent" them down to the first level, then borrowed 422 from Mr Tung to laugh at them while she waved a sign that said "April Fools" at them.
When with Sam (Loh, now to be known was pale Sam to prevent confusion), Sam (Wong) and Bryant, initially to watch Horton at Cineleisure. Got the bus stop late, really late. Bryant was so bored waiting for me, he was studying Chemistry. And apparently, pale Sam had kept him in the dark about what we were going to do the whole time. He thought we were going LANning I think.
Speaking for LANning, I am disappointed in Singapore's gaming scene sometimes. It seems that we're confined to solely playing DotA or some other Warcraft mod, or playing Counterstrike. We lack finesse... Bryant agrees too...
Luohan : Eh best friend, I heard you got 4 kills in 27 CS matches once...
Me : Shut up lah, you want to play me in Call of Duty 4??
Luohan : What the **** is that??? I bet Counterstrike pons it.
This is Luohan, a guy who goes to LAN as often as some people change their socks. And he has never even HEARD of CoD4. Frickin CoD4!!! Of course, one can't really blame him, its the society. Like a Chinese expository, one must blame the society, the school and the parents whenever a problem with the youth comes out as the question.
Anyhow, back on track, Bryant noticed that everyone was dressed to kill on Orchad Road.
Bryant : And here I am wearing a "you mom never gets old" shirt and short pants, not jeans. Why is everyone so image conscious? I mean, I don't really care about my image most of the time.
Me : Herd mentality, they think everyone cares about what they look like. Or maybe because you're standing next to me. Everyone looks pretty standing next to me.
Bryant : Possibly...
Me : We could be the only enlightened ones in the community, free from this strain...Or we could be the insane ones because we don't care about how we look
Bryant : All true...
Me : My Subway sense is tingling!! There is a Subway here too!
We met up with the two Sams, but Cineleisure wasn't showing Horton, so we legged it to Shaw House nearby, with Sam trying to rip out pale Sam's kidney for some reason. I did not get a cheap shot at him while I was at it. I do not lie impulsively. It didn't have Horton either if I remember right, so we decided on Be Kind Rewind.
The saleswoman at the counter gave us the wrong timeslot at first, but even when we switched to the earlier show, we still had an hour to burn. Thank the Lord for Samantha Wong. Between random prodding and attempting to pull out pale Sam's vital organs when he remarks about her lack of height from time to time, she makes for great conversation. And she art generous with hugs.
Bryant : I think I need to get a refund on my ticket, I really need to go...
Me : But why??
Bryant : I really have to leave, my parents want me back home.
Me : Tell them the bus broke down. Or there was a terrorism drill on.
Bryant : No one buys those...
Pale Sam : Come on, you just wasted your whole weekend.
Bryant : I never had one in the first place. I had to spend it studying. Yes, go ahead and insult me.
Me : You are epic fail. Noob.
Bryant : Thats more annoying than insulting actually.
Pale Sam : I think he needs a hug.
(I hug him)
Pale Sam : Now he needs a detox chamber.
Sam : I'll do it
(She hugs him)
Pale Sam : Right, he's good now.
(She hugs the pale one)
Sam : (To me) You want a hug too??
Me : ???? (Out comes my signature blank look)
Pale Sam : You really don't want to do that.
(She hugs me anyway)
Such bravery is commendable, for it is rare indeed. Maybe this proves there actually is a girl out there somewhere who can accept me for the biohazard I am?
Yeah, well Bryant did eventually leave us when he got a refund on his ticket (deserter!). Too bad for him, Be Kind Rewind was hilarious. For Jack Black was in it.
Its about an old man, Mr Fletcher, has a video rental store called Be Kind Rewind, which is failing, so he takes time off to study the more successful chains, leaving it in the hands of his employee Mike, with instructions not to let his best friend Jerry (Black) into the store, for he destroys everything he touches.
Coincidentally, Jerry comes up with a plan to destroy the nearby power plant, believing that the FBI is using it to broadcast electronic waves to mind control him. He attempts to do so by sneaking into the plant at night and throwing a grappling hook into the transformer.
Which gets him electrocuted, and magnetized. Mike reluctantly lets him into the store for treatment when he stumbles in looking wasted, and arranges all the tapes inside, unwittingly erasing all of them, and the rest of the movie follows them desperately trying to re-act (Or as they call it, "sweding") the erased movies that customers want, roping in Alma, a girl in a laundromart, to help them "swede" the movies. Jerry eventually loses his magnetism when he takes a piss on the street, which is also magnetized. It was a true WIN scene to watch all the nuts, bolts, drink
Their "Sweded" movies are a hit with the customers, and they do brisk business, and just in time too, since Mr Fletcher learns that he needs to refurbish the place to prevent it from being demolished by the city council, and needs 60 grand to do so. All goes well till the Copyright Office arrives and destroys all their "sweded" movies for copyright infringement using a steam roller.
With a few thousand left to go, Mike, Jerry and Alma make one last "sweded" movie, one of their own so the Copyright Office can't arrest them. This time, it is about the jazz legend Fat Waller, who never actually lived in the town, using the last week they have before the demolition to film it. Despite a hundred people coming to watch it, they can't raise enough money to stop the demolition. Mr Fletcher resignedly goes out to tell the workmen outside that they can start when he finds out the entire town has gathered outside to watch the film. And it ends there.
Couple of my favourite lines
-----------------------------
Mike : Okay, now to shoot the final scene of Ghostbusters...
Jerry : Hold it!! You can't shoot a dramatic scene during the day! You can't!
Mike : Jerry, Miss Falewicz will be here in less than an hour, we don't have time!
(Jerry reaches for the camera)
Mike : Are you nuts, you're magnetized remember, you'll erase everything!
Jerry : Sigh, there's a button that says "Negative", press it.
Mike : You're right, it works. But I'm white in it. And you're black.
Jerry : Again, I have an idea
(They photostat their faces and wear the paper as masks)
------------------------------
Mike : (Running while filming the credits for the Ghostbusters film) This film was written and produced by Dan Akroyd. (Hums out Ghostbusters theme song)
------------------------------
Baliff : I'm afraid I'm going to have to confiscate every tape here for copyright infringement.
Jerry : You can't do that!!
Baliff : Yes I can. The copyright message is shown at the start of every video.
Jerry : But we erased that too!
------------------------------
JD : Thats a rip off man, ten bucks for a video!
Jerry : They're, erm, sweded...
Alma : Yeah they're, erm, from, Sweden!
JD : Sweden's a country, not a verb.
Alma : Its an expensive country, thats why the videos are so expensive!
-------------------------------
Jerry : Sorry, we only allow 2 movies to be taken out per account, store policy.
JD : Thats cool, I want to start an account right now.
Alma : We're going to need your date of birth, a letter from your parents if you're a minor, a list of countries which you've traveled to prior to registraion, your blood type, records from your last ten dentist visits and your top 10 favourite movies.
JD : You're lucky we don't beat girls up.
--------------------------------
For some reason, Sam kept tapping my feet during the movie. Intentionally or not, I don't know. I was too busy eating my Subway sandwich to ask.
Pale Sam's dad called me on my way home. From Tokyo. To see if I had any idea where his son was. I honestly had no idea where he had gone, though it sounded like I covered up for pale Sam to prevent his parents from tearing him a new bodily orifice in him. So he owes me big anyway.
April has started off rather well. For the first time in my life, I was not pranked on April Fools!
Deon : Hey Micro, got training today.
Micro : Nut off, its April Fools
Deon : Damn...
Maybe if Loy or Gabriel had done it, it would more believable, but this is Deon we're talking about, the one who only shows up sporadically for training.
Got Bryant on April Fools too.
Me : Hey Bryant, Chinese focus group is canceled today
Bryant : YES!!!! (Does dance)
Me : You do remember what day it is today right??
Bryant : **** you...
Ms Kaur's was still the most 1337 prank though. 423 tried to prank her by switching class with 106, she screwed them over, "sent" them down to the first level, then borrowed 422 from Mr Tung to laugh at them while she waved a sign that said "April Fools" at them.
When with Sam (Loh, now to be known was pale Sam to prevent confusion), Sam (Wong) and Bryant, initially to watch Horton at Cineleisure. Got the bus stop late, really late. Bryant was so bored waiting for me, he was studying Chemistry. And apparently, pale Sam had kept him in the dark about what we were going to do the whole time. He thought we were going LANning I think.
Speaking for LANning, I am disappointed in Singapore's gaming scene sometimes. It seems that we're confined to solely playing DotA or some other Warcraft mod, or playing Counterstrike. We lack finesse... Bryant agrees too...
Luohan : Eh best friend, I heard you got 4 kills in 27 CS matches once...
Me : Shut up lah, you want to play me in Call of Duty 4??
Luohan : What the **** is that??? I bet Counterstrike pons it.
This is Luohan, a guy who goes to LAN as often as some people change their socks. And he has never even HEARD of CoD4. Frickin CoD4!!! Of course, one can't really blame him, its the society. Like a Chinese expository, one must blame the society, the school and the parents whenever a problem with the youth comes out as the question.
Anyhow, back on track, Bryant noticed that everyone was dressed to kill on Orchad Road.
Bryant : And here I am wearing a "you mom never gets old" shirt and short pants, not jeans. Why is everyone so image conscious? I mean, I don't really care about my image most of the time.
Me : Herd mentality, they think everyone cares about what they look like. Or maybe because you're standing next to me. Everyone looks pretty standing next to me.
Bryant : Possibly...
Me : We could be the only enlightened ones in the community, free from this strain...Or we could be the insane ones because we don't care about how we look
Bryant : All true...
Me : My Subway sense is tingling!! There is a Subway here too!
We met up with the two Sams, but Cineleisure wasn't showing Horton, so we legged it to Shaw House nearby, with Sam trying to rip out pale Sam's kidney for some reason. I did not get a cheap shot at him while I was at it. I do not lie impulsively. It didn't have Horton either if I remember right, so we decided on Be Kind Rewind.
The saleswoman at the counter gave us the wrong timeslot at first, but even when we switched to the earlier show, we still had an hour to burn. Thank the Lord for Samantha Wong. Between random prodding and attempting to pull out pale Sam's vital organs when he remarks about her lack of height from time to time, she makes for great conversation. And she art generous with hugs.
Bryant : I think I need to get a refund on my ticket, I really need to go...
Me : But why??
Bryant : I really have to leave, my parents want me back home.
Me : Tell them the bus broke down. Or there was a terrorism drill on.
Bryant : No one buys those...
Pale Sam : Come on, you just wasted your whole weekend.
Bryant : I never had one in the first place. I had to spend it studying. Yes, go ahead and insult me.
Me : You are epic fail. Noob.
Bryant : Thats more annoying than insulting actually.
Pale Sam : I think he needs a hug.
(I hug him)
Pale Sam : Now he needs a detox chamber.
Sam : I'll do it
(She hugs him)
Pale Sam : Right, he's good now.
(She hugs the pale one)
Sam : (To me) You want a hug too??
Me : ???? (Out comes my signature blank look)
Pale Sam : You really don't want to do that.
(She hugs me anyway)
Such bravery is commendable, for it is rare indeed. Maybe this proves there actually is a girl out there somewhere who can accept me for the biohazard I am?
Yeah, well Bryant did eventually leave us when he got a refund on his ticket (deserter!). Too bad for him, Be Kind Rewind was hilarious. For Jack Black was in it.
Its about an old man, Mr Fletcher, has a video rental store called Be Kind Rewind, which is failing, so he takes time off to study the more successful chains, leaving it in the hands of his employee Mike, with instructions not to let his best friend Jerry (Black) into the store, for he destroys everything he touches.
Coincidentally, Jerry comes up with a plan to destroy the nearby power plant, believing that the FBI is using it to broadcast electronic waves to mind control him. He attempts to do so by sneaking into the plant at night and throwing a grappling hook into the transformer.
Which gets him electrocuted, and magnetized. Mike reluctantly lets him into the store for treatment when he stumbles in looking wasted, and arranges all the tapes inside, unwittingly erasing all of them, and the rest of the movie follows them desperately trying to re-act (Or as they call it, "sweding") the erased movies that customers want, roping in Alma, a girl in a laundromart, to help them "swede" the movies. Jerry eventually loses his magnetism when he takes a piss on the street, which is also magnetized. It was a true WIN scene to watch all the nuts, bolts, drink
Their "Sweded" movies are a hit with the customers, and they do brisk business, and just in time too, since Mr Fletcher learns that he needs to refurbish the place to prevent it from being demolished by the city council, and needs 60 grand to do so. All goes well till the Copyright Office arrives and destroys all their "sweded" movies for copyright infringement using a steam roller.
With a few thousand left to go, Mike, Jerry and Alma make one last "sweded" movie, one of their own so the Copyright Office can't arrest them. This time, it is about the jazz legend Fat Waller, who never actually lived in the town, using the last week they have before the demolition to film it. Despite a hundred people coming to watch it, they can't raise enough money to stop the demolition. Mr Fletcher resignedly goes out to tell the workmen outside that they can start when he finds out the entire town has gathered outside to watch the film. And it ends there.
Couple of my favourite lines
-----------------------------
Mike : Okay, now to shoot the final scene of Ghostbusters...
Jerry : Hold it!! You can't shoot a dramatic scene during the day! You can't!
Mike : Jerry, Miss Falewicz will be here in less than an hour, we don't have time!
(Jerry reaches for the camera)
Mike : Are you nuts, you're magnetized remember, you'll erase everything!
Jerry : Sigh, there's a button that says "Negative", press it.
Mike : You're right, it works. But I'm white in it. And you're black.
Jerry : Again, I have an idea
(They photostat their faces and wear the paper as masks)
------------------------------
Mike : (Running while filming the credits for the Ghostbusters film) This film was written and produced by Dan Akroyd. (Hums out Ghostbusters theme song)
------------------------------
Baliff : I'm afraid I'm going to have to confiscate every tape here for copyright infringement.
Jerry : You can't do that!!
Baliff : Yes I can. The copyright message is shown at the start of every video.
Jerry : But we erased that too!
------------------------------
JD : Thats a rip off man, ten bucks for a video!
Jerry : They're, erm, sweded...
Alma : Yeah they're, erm, from, Sweden!
JD : Sweden's a country, not a verb.
Alma : Its an expensive country, thats why the videos are so expensive!
-------------------------------
Jerry : Sorry, we only allow 2 movies to be taken out per account, store policy.
JD : Thats cool, I want to start an account right now.
Alma : We're going to need your date of birth, a letter from your parents if you're a minor, a list of countries which you've traveled to prior to registraion, your blood type, records from your last ten dentist visits and your top 10 favourite movies.
JD : You're lucky we don't beat girls up.
--------------------------------
For some reason, Sam kept tapping my feet during the movie. Intentionally or not, I don't know. I was too busy eating my Subway sandwich to ask.
Pale Sam's dad called me on my way home. From Tokyo. To see if I had any idea where his son was. I honestly had no idea where he had gone, though it sounded like I covered up for pale Sam to prevent his parents from tearing him a new bodily orifice in him. So he owes me big anyway.
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