Scored my first try today against PJC! Not just my first try for AC, my first try.
Ever.
After 5 years in the game, on my third game for AC. Like I said, three's a charm!
Happened right after the first try in the second half. Keith caught the ball and burned his way through for 50 meters before going down a meter before the try line. Prentice got stopped half a meter before it. Someone kindly cleared the ruck before I finally plodded my way there from the halfway line.
So there the ball was, just exposed there. I ran totally on instincts I never knew I had. Grabbed ball, jumped over ruck without landing on too many people, put ball down.
I heard the referee blow a punctured sounding whistle, which could have meant various things
1. Try
2. No try
3. I need a new whistle
4. Hot damn, I'm tired...
I only got confirmation when Keith looked at me incredulously and said "Micro, did you just score?!?!". So, with the rest of the team staring at me with shock/amazement, I replied with my standard answer. "Huh?"
That was enough to keep me powered and moving at full speed until we hit 80-0.
It's a very good week. I scored for the first time *ever*, Prentice is happy again since he managed to come on in the second half just after me and score as well, Isa doesn't seem so pissed off at me since my scrum form improved.
I've picked up my class rep badge, PW teacher has OK'ed my PI ideas, and I have a B, possibly moving up to A for Physics.
Only bitch in the week so far is that I failed maths. Damn.
Tuesday, 21 April 2009
Monday, 6 April 2009
"Silent Running" and "Ninja" Perks
First off, thanks for dropping by here Ollyvia, I'm glad you like the scarf! Hope you enjoy yourself in Michigan!
Yes... it appears I have someone how acquired both these Fallout 3 perks in AC, among other things... Put simply I can move into and out of many things (etc lecture theatres, classrooms, unwanted CIP events) without anyone seemingly noticing. For laughs, I've even tried breaking into the Performing Arts Centre or whatever they call it here, but no one came to make it interesting and I got bored since the only room that wasn't locked was the sound room or something, it was so dark I couldn't tell...
A regular Moist Von Lipwig I've become, it seems, I've become hard to notice all of a sudden. Of course, while this pseudo-invisibility is fun at times, it appears my Control Key is broken. That means I'm stuck in this mode till I get a new keyboard for my life. It also means that no one notices me till I do something that pisses them off. Appears to be true in many cases...
Anyway, off that depressing topic and onto...well, a potentially more depressing topic, the rugby team. While I did play during the 114-0 pwning of HCJC, I've injured Prentice pretty badly during training, and while he's trying to be nice about it, I know he's just really, really angry about it, and with me. Isa appears to be mad at me for some reason as well.
Why?
Because I don't try hard enough during training?
The immensely long time I am taking to remember basic manouvers?
Because I don't seem enthusiastic at training?
Because I'm too quiet during training?
Given the high standards here, I'm probably guilty of the first, I'm definitely guilty of the second, but I'll be very upset if it's the last two. I don't say anything at training because I simply don't feel I'm in a position to. Everyone else plays better than me, I have nothing to offer in advice skill-wise, I'm faring worse during all the fitness sessions, I don't feel I should really be encouraging if I'm at the back end, I've always felt that it's the coaches discretion when it comes to deciding who plays, so I don't request to be fielded... What can I do but keep quiet?
Quiet...I seem to have silenced myself since coming here...No one appears to hear me anyway, so why bother, I tell myself. Irony of it all is, when I went back to CJC, one of the first things my friends there noticed was that I became "more outgoing."
The irony...
CJC...It was so good to be back. To go back to where I can see a familiar face everywhere, people I can hold a conversation with, people who won't rudely disappear halfway through when I'm talking. I don't have to raise my voice to be heard there. I'm not forced to roam amongst the shadows because I feel unwanted there.
Going back there, I was really, truly at ease for the first time in a long time. I didn't have to worry if people could hear me, I could laugh without sounding fake, I could really smile without forcing myself to, I could forget I totally screwed myself up in AC and just be happy to be amongst friends would even noticed I was there.
I just wanted to cry when I went back. I've done a lot of crying since arriving here. Corryn, Hong Kong, the list goes on...
Ah what the hell, the first step to solving a problem is to admit there is a problem.
The dream is dead.
My class doesn't care about me, and I don't care about them.
The team doesn't appear to need or want me around.
I find it hard going without the recognition I had back then.
The SJI cadre here consists mostly of people I was never very close to, and everyone else seems to have assimilated easily here, I don't want to weigh them down.
I'm sick and tired of being constantly on guard not to lose my temper or break down.
I'm feeling miserable here, plain and simple.
There's just one thing that keeps me going. And I'll lose that too, if I break down and give up. Duty-bound.
Yes... it appears I have someone how acquired both these Fallout 3 perks in AC, among other things... Put simply I can move into and out of many things (etc lecture theatres, classrooms, unwanted CIP events) without anyone seemingly noticing. For laughs, I've even tried breaking into the Performing Arts Centre or whatever they call it here, but no one came to make it interesting and I got bored since the only room that wasn't locked was the sound room or something, it was so dark I couldn't tell...
A regular Moist Von Lipwig I've become, it seems, I've become hard to notice all of a sudden. Of course, while this pseudo-invisibility is fun at times, it appears my Control Key is broken. That means I'm stuck in this mode till I get a new keyboard for my life. It also means that no one notices me till I do something that pisses them off. Appears to be true in many cases...
Anyway, off that depressing topic and onto...well, a potentially more depressing topic, the rugby team. While I did play during the 114-0 pwning of HCJC, I've injured Prentice pretty badly during training, and while he's trying to be nice about it, I know he's just really, really angry about it, and with me. Isa appears to be mad at me for some reason as well.
Why?
Because I don't try hard enough during training?
The immensely long time I am taking to remember basic manouvers?
Because I don't seem enthusiastic at training?
Because I'm too quiet during training?
Given the high standards here, I'm probably guilty of the first, I'm definitely guilty of the second, but I'll be very upset if it's the last two. I don't say anything at training because I simply don't feel I'm in a position to. Everyone else plays better than me, I have nothing to offer in advice skill-wise, I'm faring worse during all the fitness sessions, I don't feel I should really be encouraging if I'm at the back end, I've always felt that it's the coaches discretion when it comes to deciding who plays, so I don't request to be fielded... What can I do but keep quiet?
Quiet...I seem to have silenced myself since coming here...No one appears to hear me anyway, so why bother, I tell myself. Irony of it all is, when I went back to CJC, one of the first things my friends there noticed was that I became "more outgoing."
The irony...
CJC...It was so good to be back. To go back to where I can see a familiar face everywhere, people I can hold a conversation with, people who won't rudely disappear halfway through when I'm talking. I don't have to raise my voice to be heard there. I'm not forced to roam amongst the shadows because I feel unwanted there.
Going back there, I was really, truly at ease for the first time in a long time. I didn't have to worry if people could hear me, I could laugh without sounding fake, I could really smile without forcing myself to, I could forget I totally screwed myself up in AC and just be happy to be amongst friends would even noticed I was there.
I just wanted to cry when I went back. I've done a lot of crying since arriving here. Corryn, Hong Kong, the list goes on...
Ah what the hell, the first step to solving a problem is to admit there is a problem.
The dream is dead.
My class doesn't care about me, and I don't care about them.
The team doesn't appear to need or want me around.
I find it hard going without the recognition I had back then.
The SJI cadre here consists mostly of people I was never very close to, and everyone else seems to have assimilated easily here, I don't want to weigh them down.
I'm sick and tired of being constantly on guard not to lose my temper or break down.
I'm feeling miserable here, plain and simple.
There's just one thing that keeps me going. And I'll lose that too, if I break down and give up. Duty-bound.
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